Mar 28, 2012

Community

Today has been a hard day. This post might go in a lot of different directions, because multiple things are getting at me. The boys have been a little off the past few days. Waking hours before they normally do each morning, which then results in them being tired cranky little stinks that wont even nap. So, less sleep and emotional behavior. Not a good mix.


I took Weston in for a hair cut.  I had been putting it off because they always mess his hair up. I'm not posting a picture...I hate it :(

And then a rumor made it's way back to me, that broke my heart. And I know... I shouldn't let a rumor ruin my day, and I wont because it probably is only partially true. But they just  don't get made up out of thin air, you know?

I had lunch with my dad earlier. He always gives the best advice. He told me that some friendships are just for seasons, and some wouldn't even work with the one I'm in now. He said I should look back and be thankful for how much fun it was in that season, and consider it a blessing, instead of feeling regret that it ended. I know I'm at fault for things, but I never intentionally meant to hurt anyone just like I have to believe they didn't either.

I really need to just take a look around, instead of dwelling...back there. Over the past month I feel God is stretching me in new ways. I used to think that we could only find community with people in the same stage of life as us but Ben has found a wonderful friendship with a man as old as his own father.
And I even feel like I'm starting to form friendships with those I never considered. People that inspire, and encourage me, that I can share the deep things on my heart and have them relate. People who I can have conversations with about more than just kids, clothes, new movies, and places to eat. Because while all those things are apart of my life, and while I might just be "mommy" right now, I was made for more. And my heart knows it, and aches for it and longs to be surrounded by those with that same desire.

I'm realizing, that if I only look for those I have natural things in common with, like age, marital status, kids, jobs etc. to find friendships, then they can only go so far. Because in life, we're always changing and entering new stages, but not always at the same time.

So here's me, once again, letting go of the past and looking forward to whats next, keeping my heart open to find community in the places I never thought to look.

Sharing my heart here

8 comments:

  1. I think friendships can be a hard thing. People you think that you will be friends with forever just drop completely out of your life. It is easy to get caught up with your family and not think you need friends sometimes, but I think we do. I hang on to those friends I know will be with me for a long time!!!

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  2. Sorry you're having a bad day. I think we all have them from time to time. I've never been one to have a lot of friends. I have several and I know the ones that are true friends. I hand pick my friends. Yes we all grow and change throughout the years however I make it a point to make friends with people that have the same kind of thinking as I do, similar values and beliefs, etc. People are going to dissapoint at one time or another even family but I think the key to all friendships/relationships is mutual respect. It's ok to say, time to move on and let go of whatever it is that's causing you pain ... as in friendships. Sometimes it's better to let go. It doesn't mean you're a horrible person, it's just better for you. I also strongly believe that family is THE most important thing in life. Yeah, we need friends from time to time but without family we are empty. I don't know you well but from what I gather on your post you seem to have it together pretty good and above all you love God so don't let "stuff" get you down.

    About your kids well, they seem to be going through changes as well. I know it's hard ( I have 3 from a teenager to a 15 month old so I have a bit of experience) but things do get better. It's all part of life and it all depends how we handle the challanges. What I've found out helps ME when I'm having a bad day or things aren't going the way I want them to is I listen to music or watch a funny or action movie to get my mind off things, and I do pray about what's troubling me as well. Do things that makes YOU happy.
    Take care. Blessings.

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  3. I just wrote a post somewhat similar to this in regards to friendships. Something I have learned (the hard way) recently is that people come in and out of your life for specific reasons at certain times. I still get caught up in dwelling on the past but all I can do is move forward from friendships that just don't work anymore or that are causing me pain and not happiness. Sometimes it is really hard to accept... but people change and life changes. With that said, I have learned to strengthen and renew the positive friendships in life.

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  4. i dont know exactly what happened, but I can relate to the pain of letting go of a friendship that you didnt think you would have to let go of. Im in the same situation right now actually, and...it sucks. Im sorry you are mourning the loss of a friend, and I think it is important to acknowledge that there were great things that you gained through that friendship...even though it might be over.

    Also...sorry about the haircut! Jack has a buzzy cut because it got seriously messed up(not his first haircut, the 2nd), and now the growing out process is too horrible. His hair just wont grow out nicely, so...buzzy hair it is! At least for now. I cried at first, I love it now, but I wanted his little baby hairs back.

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  5. Great wisdom from your dad- thanks for sharing. :)

    Ps-why do babies who sleep less at night nap less during the day? Don't they understand that's not how it works?!

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  6. I love your dad's advice. : ) I'm sorry it was a rough day.

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  7. friendships are so hard and confusing at times!! love the advice from your dad! i go to my dad for advice to sometimes!! hope you are having a better day today! <3

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  8. Sorry you've been having a rough time :( When the kiddos don't get enough sleep - everything else is just so much harder... i fell your pain... it will get back on track soon! :)

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