I have felt the need to protect Kingston lately. (if you couldn't tell by my previous posts) It's like this new feeling I get when I see that he's being picked on or even judged by other adults. I hate the way it feels, but Kingston is not always in the wrong. I don't even know how to handle it, so maybe thats why it bothers me so much. I'm used to turning the other cheek when I'm the one being "attacked" but when it's my son, what am I supposed to do?
Do I just let God be his defender too? What if I don't feel like He does a good enough job and maybe he needs me to step in and say something? I know that isn't true but I feel that way at times.
I was praying yesterday and asking God why I can't just let these things go and why they bother me so much in the first place. And then I realized, that in these situations where Kingston is the one blamed, my need to defend him stems from my need to protect him from what I went through growing up and still deal with as an adult.
I know I can't protect him from everything but I wish I could protect him from that feeling he might experience later down the road. Once people have their mind made up about you, it's pretty hard to change that. I hope Kingston will be surrounded by people who can love, extend grace and appreciate all the good qualities in him, because there are so many!